Marriage, Family and Relationships, Laws of Doing

Marriage is "1. the act of uniting a man and woman for life; wedlock; the legal union of a man and woman for life. 2. Marriage is a contract both civil and religious, by which the parties engage to live together in mutual affection and fidelity, till death shall separate them. 3. Marriage was instituted by God himself for the purpose of preventing the promiscuous intercourse of the sexes, for promoting domestic felicity, and for securing the maintenance and education of children. 4. In a scriptural sense, marriage is the union between Christ and his church by the covenant of grace."

Family is defined as "1. the collective body of persons who live in one house and under one head or manager; a household, including parents, children and servants, and as the case may be, lodgers or boarders. 2. Those who descend from one common progenitor; a tribe or race; kindred; lineage. The whole human race are the family of Adam, the human family. 3. Course of descent; genealogy; line of ancestors."

Relationship is "the state of being related by kindred, affinity or other alliance."

Every degree and kind of human relationship is a facet of your relationship with God. Many people expect a relationship (marriage, children or a new job) to change their life for them, but unless they choose to change themselves and/or their approach to relationships, only harder, more difficult initiations will result. To master relationships on the outer, you must seek a more perfect relationship with your Creator, then learn how to love as God loves.

Edna Lister on Marriage, Family and Relationships

If you always exhibit sweetness of disposition, you cannot avoid lifting your whole family. Radiate sweetness, and lift people with a sense that it is your privilege to do so. That way the Light-as-Power lifts them until they accept that God's "good" must control them. – Edna Lister, January 16, 1933.

You have been given the charge of lifting the family you were born or adopted into. It is your privilege to lift them to a cloud continent of Light and to fill them so full of love that they can't do anything but love all others in return. You can love anyone you choose into the Light and see them change into Light. You can lift yourself, your burdens, family, social and work groups, and the world. The higher you lift them, the higher you will be lifted by the Light your lifting releases. Let's pour out enough love to do this! – Edna Lister, The Sermon on the Mount, January 31, 1933.

The disposition of one member affects the whole family. If one person fears, it results in a roomful of fear. You cannot live life alone and all by yourself; everything and everyone is interrelated. – Edna Lister, Psychology's Relation to Metaphysics, September 24, 1934.

You can always improve yourself socially by choosing the right kind of friends, avoiding associates who discourage you, taking more interest in your family, friends, neighborhood, taking more interest in your city, state, nation and world, treating others as you would like to be treated, and by loving your neighbor as you love yourself. – Edna Lister, How to Improve in Every Way, January 4, 1936.

"This is my commandment, That ye love one another, as I have loved you." – John 15:12. The Master's idea of loving one another holds a key to human relationships: Let us understand each another, for wisdom is born of this work to understand each other. – Edna Lister, August 19, 1938.

Love, used as compassion over the frailties of the other, holds love's bloom on marriage forever. Love is as durable as you make it and covers all transgressions if you use it. Love knows itself and its own. Love feeds upon itself and not upon the loved one, magnifies the one whom it loves, asks no favors and gives all. Love's strength lies in its self-sustaining ability. Love's keynote is a deep, abiding devotion to the loved one. Love burns steadfastly under all conditions, joy or sorrow, separation or unity. Love counts no effort too great nor too small, and no task too hard nor too long. Love is never conscious of giving, but like sunshine, shares itself with all. True love withstands all separation and lives forever. – Edna Lister, Undated Papers, December 1938.

The perfect blessing for a married couple is that they may love, honor and cherish each other, and so live in faithfulness, patience, wisdom, and true graciousness that their home is a haven of peace. – Edna Lister, Undated Papers, 1938.

When you think of another, you touch him then, no matter the distance. This carries a great responsibility, for your desire must be the Master's perfect, selfless love and full compassion. What you would like a loved one to do "colors" your love vibration, and if your desire is strong enough to change his path, God will hold you responsible for the outcome. You must be very sure that your love thoughts are pure white Light, not colored by your desires. Legally, you can have only one desire for all others: that they may be free to live their God-given life perfectly, although their choices in doing so may not appeal to you. – Edna Lister, November 16, 1939.

No attitude in relationships is as pathetic as self-righteousness about a disappointing love affair. – Edna Lister, July 8, 1941.

When you use force, you create a great soul debt, and you will suffer as the kickback of force returns to you to be lifted. Suffering, whether physical, emotional, mental or spiritual, always helps to pay a family's spiritual debts or your own personal soul debts as the created force returns. Changing the darkness into Light again does not take back the force you created when you misused Power. You must also redeem the Substance and the Mind involved. – Edna Lister, November 3, 1941.

God pays no attention to the deductions your family claims against you. – Edna Lister, December 6, 1941.

A little loneliness will not hurt you, so don't let it rule your life and attitudes. – Edna Lister, March 26, 1943.

The power over your marriage is placed in your hands. Be watchful, let nothing of the self steal your love's crown jewels, and avoid anything that would disturb your newly appointed life. Once self upsets love's balance, you have cracked love's perfect beauty. You can mend it, but everyone can see the patch. Only petty self can mar the bloom of love's beauty, which you may not repair. Once self abrades love's pristine glory, only another lifetime can remake its original beauty. – Edna Lister, February 7, 1945.

When you are established on your own life's path, what you make of it, what you do with all you have will determine what you get out of it. Always take time to be happy. Find new ways to be full of joy. It takes time and effort but pays the greatest of dividends. Marriage partners must each match the other's sacrifices or the relationship will grow lopsided. Give enough joy, enough love. Compromise when you can, but never give up your principles. – Edna Lister, February 9, 1945.

When another asks, prods, or snoops about your loved ones, defend them by covering them in Light. Say, "Excuse me, but I do not discuss my loved ones." – Edna Lister, September 4, 1945.

Self always puts up a veil to hide from greater truth or Light. Don't break through your loved one's veil of Light for petty reasons or allow selfishness to mar a universal and forever love. – Edna Lister, December 1945.

Some couples don't "see" each other until the "right" time, since they must pay soul debts or complete unfinished experience-lessons to be ready for each other. When they do meet, it's like a match in dry grass. They will be happier because of the delay. – Edna Lister, February 8, 1946.

The love a woman gives wholly, freely, without asking anything in return, makes her beauty unearthly and increases it a thousandfold. – Edna Lister, February 8, 1946.

Lift all points of force as you pray for family in a problem situation. Each brings his own resentment and rebellion into the present. Someone must lift all those lifetimes of disobedience into love. Be a silent lifter! – Edna Lister, August 29, 1946.

Never sit in judgment on your own loved ones. – Edna Lister, June 17, 1947.

Be longsighted in your relationships with others. The selfish soul thinks only of his personal relationship to God, never considering his relationship with the other fellow. – Edna Lister, July 2, 1947.

No soul debt accrues where true love is the basis for a love relationship, but breaking the laws of convention always blights the bloom on love. Both, especially the woman, pay a fancy price. – Edna Lister, August 24, 1947.

Examine your past relationships honestly and without blame to discern what you have done wrong. – Edna Lister, December 13, 1947.

Align your relationship with God, and you can better and more easily align your relationships with others. – Edna Lister, From Light to Form as a Creator, August 2, 1949.

Most arguments result from people voicing blame or being afraid to defend their opinions to their families and friends. If you fear admitting your convictions, remain silent. Yet remember that when you seek agreement in the kingdom of heaven, the Father puts the perfect words of love on your lips. The first step in agreeing with the adversary is to seek first the kingdom of heaven yourself, remembering that you cannot drag cantankerous family members into heaven or push them in ahead of you. – Edna Lister, I Remember, October 8, 1950.

God justifies and glorifies the soul who steps up to become Godlike. Yet deviate from the family pattern and they will call you crazy. Inner pressure builds when you are hurt emotionally, and when you allow self to be hurt, you are blaming another. Open the safety relief valve, and step up to where criticism cannot hurt your feelings. Soothe and calm the angered one with Light. Glory blots out the anger when you cover the other fellow with Light. Never charge a debt of blame against one who tries to hurt you. If you push him out of your life, he will forever try to climb back into the nest. – Edna Lister, To Seek the Light, June 10, 1951.

You must tie your earth to your heaven and reach balance, but to ascend, you must lift your family with you as you go. – Edna Lister, Be-Attitudes, June 12, 1951.

Anyone who lets a grievous family or work situation drag on becomes a martyr. – Edna Lister, July 19, 1951.

If a loved one explodes in anger, God expects you to stand and lift the spewing, though some force may remain. You feel a sense of urgency, you run, hurry to reach up, and lift your family. In so doing, you may precipitate a rain of soul debts, so cover it in Light. – Edna Lister, August 31, 1952.

The feminine must guard the masculine. The masculine must protect the feminine. – Edna Lister, September 4, 1952.

Every square inch of your body pushes 14 pounds of atmospheric pressure as you face family, friends, and your business life. Pressures from each impinge upon you from every direction when you are low in consciousness. You feel the world pressing against you, and curse government, business associates, etc. You build pressure and explode in some illness — swollen feet, legs, hands, glands or even brain cells swollen from pride in your own goodness. Then you want to find God the easy way, not to be kicked upstairs by one who tells truth and makes you dig out your mess. The truly easy way is to remember that Light goes before you to clear the way when you live by the Light and declare your creations good. – Edna Lister, The Magic in the Sky, October 5, 1952.

God pays no attention to the deductions your family gives you. How hard you work at being a good Son or Daughter of God is what determines your inner status. – Edna Lister, Ye Are Gods, November 30, 1952.

"A man's home is his castle." – Sir William Blackstone. The world honors and treats a man with respect and dignity in his castle. Even when a man has broken the law, law itself knocks on the door of his castle. – Edna Lister, December 18, 1952.

Just because your family grows ears like a donkey, you need not grow the tail! – Edna Lister, December 18, 1952.

People yearn after one of two things, God or the world, including family, friends and organizations. – Edna Lister, Prayer: The Soul's Aspiration, June 7, 1953.

Go your mate's way when you can without giving up your principles, yet beware using this as an excuse for stubbornness or spinelessness. – Edna Lister, July 15, 1953.

When someone says, "You love him more than me," let the love of God flood you, pour it forth to all your loved ones and love will fill them. This way they receive all the love they can take and are satisfied. – Edna Lister, May 30, 1954.

Why your family, friends and loved ones won't accept new ideas: Acceptance of new ideas, thoughts and concepts means cracking the shell surrounding the old ideas. Under the laws of ascension, those around you cannot have their shells cracked too hard or it will destroy their understanding. The best way to crack another's shell is to be an ensample of unconquerable faith, invincible love, irresistible attraction, wisdom, and a joy vibration that reaches out its arms and enfolds. – Edna Lister, I Arise! June 20, 1954.

"I have come to set a man against his father, a daughter against her mother, and a daughter-in-law against her mother‑in‑law; and a man's enemies will be those of his own household. He who loves father or mother more than me is not worthy of me. And he who loves son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me." – Matthew 10:35-37. These verses concern your outer attitudes and earth relationships. You must "seek first the kingdom of God," when family disputes arise. Put your high vision into action and "all these things will be added to you."

Your mirror of soul reveals self, and reflects everything you have vowed to clean up. You become a mirror for others when you take up greater responsibility. Not knowing law, whom will others credit for the unwelcome reflection? You must take into your arms of Light what your mirror reflects and return it to God; cleanse the skunks and make them floral bouquets. You may not love your family more than you love the Master. Love God first, then your family with God's universal compassionate love. Choose to be irresponsible and earth's loyalties, honors and obligations will entangle you until you are in bondage to earth.

The little self wants freedom so others won't bother you. You can avoid people by living alone or ignoring your family, but soul debts always catch up with you. People become deaf because the subconscious mind knows they really don't want to hear what others have to say. The subconscious obeys utterly, and will close out the whole world. – Edna Lister, I Surrender, July 4, 1954.

Most couples do not want separation, but freedom from another's possessiveness, nagging, and lack of understanding. If counselors taught soul freedom, many couples would reunite. When you ascend to comprehension, compassion descends to help you to understand your mate. Just love God and surrender to Him. – Edna Lister, July 12, 1954.

Great Power is always released as Light at holidays, which can cause family arguments. Before your family members gather for these delicate situations, robe them all in Light. – Edna Lister, Jesus, the Ascended God, December 19, 1954.

Every man or woman who mothers anything, business, patients, clients, animals — lives under the Mother Love ray. You become a mother to any thing or person whom you love enough, regardless of whether you are a man or woman. Your business becomes your "holy ground." Your home and family become your temple because you let the Mother Love of God use you. Lift, enfold, brood over, and cover your domain with your wings of love. Yearn over them all, as God loves you. – Edna Lister, Every Mother's Domain, May 8, 1955.

"It is impossible that no offences will come, but woe to him through whom they do come! It would be better for him that a millstone were hung around his neck, and he were thrown into the sea, than that he should offend one of these little ones. Take heed to yourselves. If your brother sins against you, rebuke him; and if he repents, forgive him. And if he sins against you seven times in a day, and seven times in a day returns to you, saying, I repent, you shall forgive him." – Luke 17:1-4.

Offenses will come because as many paths back to God exist as there are individuals. For example, every member of a family is different in his self-centered desires and soul-centered desires. People differ in their interpretation and application of what they know. – Edna Lister, Forgiveness, September 25, 1955.

"Me" and "mine" are the watchwords of self-love; its keynote is love of "my things," love of my family, love of my life. Self love breeds self-preservation to defend "me" and "mine," and has caused every lie ever told. It's as primitive as cave dwellers huddling together in fear. Love for your neighbor was born in ancient communities bound together for self-preservation, yet is also the first step toward love for God. You love your life, your possessions, your family, and begin cooperating, living together and helping each other. Love for your neighbor defends the whole clan or tribe, and from it is born the love of your nation. – Edna Lister, The Three Loves, April 15, 1956.

Sentimental love is overly indulgent and demanding for the self, which makes it weak, watery, thin, and diluted. In a marriage, sentimental love says, "I've given you the best years of my life." Sentimental mothers are greedy and demanding. A child is a soul in his or her own right. Children are your teachers, your trainers, for you are forced upward into divine Mind for the answers in teaching and training them. – Edna Lister, Nourishing Love, May 13, 1956.

Devotional love always thinks of God first. Dwelling in the love of God, you give up always having your own way. Devotional love of God is both persuasive and aggressive. Its keynote is expansive, and you never find it sitting still while waiting. It waits while serving, while working out its own salvation. Some women fear the advantages of devotional love, because they lack the wisdom to balance their love. Such a mother, for example, when dividing dessert among a family of five will cut only four pieces, leaving herself out and teaching her loved one to be selfish. This is not the family's fault. She is cheating herself and ruining the family, especially the children, for she sends the message, "You can expect me to give up my fair share for no good reason." She must count herself as one of the family, otherwise, her love creates weakness. – Edna Lister, Nourishing Love, May 13, 1956.

Remember the good things, not the negatives. Dramatize the good, talk about only the good, the funny, the joyous, and you so infiltrate family and friends with Light that they forget anything negative. – Edna Lister, No Shadow of Turning, July 15, 1956.

When you grasp a higher law, you seem to secede from your group (or family); the group considers itself perfect, so they persecute and blame you when you live by higher law. You take Light into your family, but the Light causes change. It shows up what is in the dark places, and gives the others a guilt complex. They cannot hide from the Light, so they fight you. – Edna Lister, The Way, Your Path, October 14, 1956.

"I, if I be lifted up from the earth, will draw all men unto me." – John 12:32. The only way to lift is to be lifted up in consciousness. This must begin in families. Take the blame for what happens, yet be firmly final in law, and completely sweet in love and compassion. – Edna Lister, February 28, 1957.

Fill the family "bear" with Light. Bless his place, dishes and utensils at the table with an abundance of Light. Fill his easy chair with Light and put a sheet and blanket of Light on his bed. – Edna Lister, March 7, 1957.

"Let's just forget the past" can crucify your mate unless enough demonstrations of love and affection wipe out all the hurt and pain accrued in the past. – Edna Lister, June 6, 1957.

The power of love lifts hidden things from the hearts and minds of those who have stubbornly refused to listen to God's Voice and have disobeyed His commands to arise. Lift the hidden treasures of darkness and free your family of them. – Edna Lister, August 4, 1957.

People react strongly when you stand in the Light because you become a mirror for them. Some may hate what they see, not understanding that they hate their own reflection. When you have loved God enough, your work is finished, God transforms them and you live with perfection. God does the work when you love Him enough. Loving God enough makes you vital and whole. – Edna Lister, August 22, 1957.

Only another woman's love can vitalize a man if his mate does not love him with Mother Love. This works in reverse also. – Edna Lister, October 7, 1957.

No statement equals, "I love you where you are," for it invokes the power of love and washes the speaker's heart and mind. – Edna Lister, October 27, 1957.

Those who love you register your subconscious thoughts and emotions. What are you permitting yourself to think and to feel? – Edna Lister, December 30, 1957.

"I will go before thee, and make the crooked places straight: I will break in pieces the gates of brass, and cut in sunder the bars of iron: and I will give thee the treasures of darkness, and hidden riches of secret places, that thou mayest know that I, the Lord, which call thee by thy name, am the God of Israel." Isaiah 45:2-3. Why do you take revenge on your loved ones for past hurts by using criticism, idle words, and sharp tones of voice? All these are "hidden riches." Conversely, when nothing on the outer seems to justify the criticism you receive, watch your idle words and tones of voice. – Edna Lister, February 6, 1958.

Sentimentality is born of a possessive self love that squeezes its loved ones to death and collapses in a crisis when you need it most. Sentimental love will ride the loved one with a whip and spurs. Many nervous collapses are due to possessive sentimentality posing as love. – Edna Lister, Promises Fulfilled, May 11, 1958.

The higher you ascend, the more Light uses you, and serves as a prodding challenge to your family, boss and friends, as though to say, "I dare you to speak negatively to me." To avoid offending family, keep declaring "I love you. You're wonderful" to avert their anger and your self-pity. – Edna Lister, Brainwashing, Inc., October 19, 1958.

Quickly brainwash yourself with Light whenever you begin to feel "pure," proud, self-pitying or talk about how if your family and the world would be good, you could be happy. – Edna Lister, Brainwashing, Inc., October 19, 1958.

Pray in the bathroom, if necessary, to keep peace in the family, but you can do anything you wish without criticism when you "pray without ceasing," which really means being constantly God-conscious. – Edna Lister, Constancy in Obedience, October 26, 1958.

You infuriate your family when you look sanctimonious and high on the spiritual success ladder. Living with a joyous sinner is better than with a self-righteousness saint. – Edna Lister, Constancy in Obedience, October 26, 1958.

So many men and women, playboys, heartbreakers and man-traps, are still paying for their past commitments to the opposite sex. When they held the desired one in their hot little hands, they found they didn't really want the relationship. All such debts must be paid in full. – Edna Lister, October 30, 1958.

Most divorces are due to both parties' unpleasant tones of voice. – Edna Lister, October 30, 1958.

"Thou shalt not make unto thee any graven image, or any likeness of any thing that is in heaven above, or that is in the earth beneath, or that is in the water under the earth. Thou shalt not bow down thyself to them, nor serve them." – Exodus 20:4-5. This command includes giving power to your boss, family, friends, etc. When you give them power, you make a little tin god of them. – Edna Lister, The Ten Commandments, November 4, 1958.

Demanding that others recognize that yours is the "right way" puts them in bondage. Eventually you find yourself in bondage to learn this lesson. You become a slave to family and loved ones when you like to possess things or people. You must dig out the weeds to learn why you are in bondage. – Edna Lister, Realization, May 3, 1959.

The love that moves through you awakens your loved ones' conscience, and no one who has been freelancing with the will of God likes to be reminded of his responsibilities. – Edna Lister, June 22, 1959.

Adopt radar control over the self and all family situations. Stand and do nothing but love God. – Edna Lister, Your Philosophy of Freedom, June 28, 1959.

Tell your face what is in your heart. Let your family see your love. – Edna Lister, October 5, 1959.

"Nobody loves me" is the cry of self. Pour forth Light to unmask crystallized expressions when you hear that. – Edna Lister, October 5, 1959.

Those who refuse to "work out" their salvation at home, work or among family or friends, receive no ascension credits at all. They regress while thinking they are "up" in consciousness. Others, who know nothing about the ascension degrees, receive "robes and crowns" just by living a life of giving and loving, although their friends usually say others impose on them. You receive credits for all outer living, but not for holding grudges or feeling burdened. – Edna Lister, The Mystical 33 Degrees, October 13, 1959.

Thousands of couples who started as holy mates now live together and "fight it out." A divine mate makes a good teacher because he/she will polish your rough spots and sharp edges. Difficulty arises in paying vows without charity, which is a phase of love under compassion. Many live as though their mate is always wrong and they are always right; for this they receive credit for faith, yet remain in the first ten degrees. These people always tell you how "good" they are. – Edna Lister, The Mystical 33 Degrees, October 13, 1959.

One person can change the atmosphere in a family, business, or social setting. – Edna Lister, Your Full Birthright, December 6, 1959.

Use a flyswatter if you must, but don't "martyrize," carry grudges, or sulk. A pouter drives friends and family wild. – Edna Lister, Your Full Birthright, December 6, 1959.

You must lift all misused soul substance to cleanse your loved ones and the world, for the soul substance gets mixed together. Unscramble the lines of Light and cleanse their auras before you treat them. – Edna Lister, January 7, 1960.

"I am my brother's keeper." Some cut out family and friends to be left alone so they can be "free," which breaks the law of personal responsibility. When you cut a person off on the outer, you are twice as responsible for him on the inner. Put him on a cloud in God's hands. – Edna Lister, How Can I Help Myself? May 31, 1960.

To ignore a loved one is not God's way. To blot out their ugliness or lacks, go to the Source, kneel and pray in the Light, which will then descend and cover their transgressions. – Edna Lister, June 6, 1960.

Family is a blessing, though they seem to pick on you sometimes. When family prunes your green shoots of self, they are strengthening you. – Edna Lister, What Is Your Measure of Power? June 12, 1960.

Cover your family with Light. Call them "my joy and my crown" (Philippians 4:1). – Edna Lister, Realization Through Praise, June 26, 1960.

Love reaches out to create a holy family. Let love reach out through and as you. – Edna Lister, December 5, 1960.

Nowhere in the Bible does it say that you must be nailed to the cross. Declare it good until whatever it is becomes lighter and disappears, and you wonder why you were upset. Make your cross of world or family criticism into a burden of Light. When you appear to take things lightly under joyous lifting, you balance your cross on your shoulders in joy and lift, declaring it good. "Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me; for I am meek and lowly in heart: and ye shall find rest unto your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light." – Matthew 11:28-30. – Edna Lister, The Gift of Discernment, December 11, 1960.

Like a bit of leaven that causes a whole loaf to rise, love fills a family when you love enough. Leaven thoroughly permeates bread, as your Father permeates you. – Edna Lister, The Ladder of Faith, December 18, 1960.

A loved one can do nothing but ascend when you hold him high enough. – Edna Lister, December 29, 1960.

Don't "hear" it when he raises his voice. Put balls of cottony Light in your ears. Say, "Darling, I'm afraid you're straining your voice. What did you say?" Doing this twice is usually enough. – Edna Lister, January 12, 1961.

Love is the catalyst that causes no rupture. When you face one who is determined to argue, ask the Father to fill him with Light. Stand and look at him as though you were the Master. Wonder what makes him tick! He'll squirm, lose his train of thought, and walk away. – Edna Lister, January 12, 1961.

Let others "stew in their own juice." When someone hands you negativity, say, "I love you, and I hope your outcome is wonderfully successful." – Edna Lister, January 12, 1961.

Wanting is tied to mere "human nature," and the "gimmes" — give me this or give me that. "But I want it." This selfishness does soul no good. "I'm sorry" is in the "I want" class, the worldly grade of man's relationship to man. The greatest sign of lowered vibration is lack of consideration, thinking of "me." – Edna Lister, September 12, 1961.

Watch your step and your tone of voice to hold yourself from becoming a dictatorial know-it-all. Do everything in love only. – Edna Lister, September 12, 1961.

You must practice moderation and morality in your relationships. Live by absolute morality in all that involves God's Honor, and remember, you may not be moderate about principles that cover morality. – Edna Lister, October 12, 1961.

Remember, if you once look as though you have been to the Mount of Transfiguration, your family will expect you to continue to be perfect. – Edna Lister, Whither Thou Goest, October 22, 1961.

You must give up old, personal family and world patterns of physical, emotional, mental and spiritual expressions to make room for the new Christed pattern. – Edna Lister, The Fiery Furnace, November 21, 1961.

When you say you love someone, but fight him, you are not loving, but doubting. – Edna Lister, November 27, 1961.

When your Light is great enough, your family sees you as a mirror. They see their own negatives in your face and may even indulge in calling you names. – Edna Lister, What Is Illumination? May 13, 1962.

The two necessary qualities in mothering love are listening and giving. A loving mother listens under the faculty of receptivity. She sleeps with one eye open, and hears her child's every sound. – Edna Lister, What Is Illumination? May 13, 1962.

Don't pray for family harmony so you can be comfortable; 90 percent of the prayer treatments people offer for their families are diluted with self, so they barely work or not at all. – Edna Lister, Power to Transform, December 4, 1962.

You must take your loved ones with you in ascension, especially those who hate you the most. That doesn't mean you make them your bedfellows, so say, "This is enough," when they overstep the boundaries. – Edna Lister, February 27, 1963.

When you let anything or anyone on the outer — friends, family or the world — dictate to you, you do not own yourself, nor are you soul-dedicated, but just think you are. You have sold so much of your soul-stock to others, you may not have enough left to pay you living-wage dividends. – Edna Lister, Ask in My Name, May 27, 1963.

Rebirth is a mystical term meaning some goal or vision has been fulfilled. When family or friends push against the truth you speak, it is a sign of rebirth in consciousness. – Edna Lister, The Rebirth, June 9, 1963.

Investing your soul substance in another is illegal selfish possession, not love. If you possess another, you establish an inverted, sagging earthly cord that trips you both. Withdraw all possessive lines of contact, which cause a lack of energy and abundance in your material affairs. – Edna Lister, June 27, 1963.

A soul who has a great mission on earth can be sent to a domineering family to learn lessons in conquering self. One who comes up through much detrimental training usually succeeds in their mission. – Edna Lister, Earth's Final Age, July 16, 1963.

It is never legal to invest your soul substance in another, even by thinking you are doing it in love. You invest your soul substance in other people when you hold onto the past and what they have said. So what if you must "clean the Augean stable" every day with your spouse? Remember that by doing so, the Light holds you both safe. – Edna Lister, October 1, 1964.

Problems often stay unsolved and relationships tangled because each waits for the other to make the first move. Break the ice, and speak first. Quickly move toward a compromise in the Light. – Edna Lister, Deity and Divinity, October 6, 1964.

The foundation of every harmonious marriage is mutual justice. – Edna Lister, Our Bargain With Life, June 13, 1965.

All the worrying that people do handicaps their loved ones who bear the burden of all that worry. – Edna Lister, April 7, 1966.

Loving one another under divine law, especially as married couples, fulfills initiatory vows. – Edna Lister, July 19, 1966.

Move up in consciousness, onto the hub of the wheel in Light, facing the Light, confident, untouchable and unmoved from the Light. To be untouchable does not mean indifference or letting go. Immovability is a serene standing, born of a brooding, yearning attention-giving quality that pleases the other person. The darker one is, the lower in the scale, the more necessary is the attention you give, or love will never break his crust of self. – Edna Lister, November 17, 1966.

Words spoken long ago may bear fruit today. Some trees are slow in bearing fruit, but the process is inevitable once begun. The greatest difficulty is standing and holding to the truth while waiting for the blossoms and the fruit. Family difficulties arise because you want the fruit before the tree is strong enough to bear. You must give each person time to mature. – Edna Lister, November 18, 1966.

Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword. For I am come to set a man at variance against his father, and the daughter against her mother, and the daughter in law against her mother in law. And a man's foes shall be they of his own household. He that loveth father or mother more than me is not worthy of me: and he that loveth son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me. – Matthew 10:34-37. This scripture tells of setting families at variance with one another. We are the Sons and Daughters of God, responsible for releasing Light and Power. So accept this fact: You must ascend your family whether they want to or not. – Edna Lister, Faith and Strength, May 7, 1967.

Once you disarray the timing of marriage, you can't stop the deterioration, or repair this disintegration. Such a mess often happens when one party insists on marrying. – Edna Lister, May 12, 1967.

All your troubles in life stem from your relationships; you experience conflict from the time you are born into a family. The challenge is to be coordinated between soul and self, or in conflict with "little me." You must understand where you have gone wrong before you can begin to heal. – Edna Lister, Metaphysical Correspondences, May 16, 1967.

Diplomacy is a virtue, the ability or skill to handle relationships; tact falls under this. You must exercise diplomacy to handle family and business relationships. Diplomacy is applying what you know to what you are doing, the art of agreeing and adjusting to any situation or condition with "This is good. Let there be Light." – Edna Lister, Order and Diplomacy, June 4, 1967.

As you become Light, you are an increasing offense to evil, darkness, and the selfishness in others. The Light you carry in your aura can offend others when you walk into a room; thus, you are a rebuke to family and friends, so don't blame them when they attack. Anyone who argues does not want to live by laws of spirit. Stand and say mentally, "This is good. Let there be Light," while another verbally abuses you; you can't make them over, nor can they remold you. – Edna Lister, Comprehension and Nonresistance, June 25, 1967.

Your practice of religion embodies your unconscious search for balance. You must identify with something you can count on as being stable and in which you may have confidence. Eventually, you find that you must identify with something greater than self, which includes groups, family, friends, and nations. – Edna Lister, The Supremacy of Religion, November 27, 1967.

Judge not according to the appearance, but judge righteous judgment. – John 7:24 Only God can know and judge anyone in perfect justice. When you obey this law perfectly, it leaves you ample time to attend to your own affairs. It also frees your family, friends, and the world of your opinions and prejudices. It really means, "I free everyone of my ideas, and free myself to ascend. I thereby free myself of paying the debts of judging. I mind my own business." – Edna Lister, Five Important Steps in Ascension, 1968.

It's all right to love, but not to invest your soul substance life sparks in the loved one. Fill your loved ones only with God's Light, which is perfect for them. – Edna Lister, January 11, 1968.

The whole purpose of marriage is to learn how to love as the Master loves. – Edna Lister, April 5, 1968.

You must lift the whole world. If your family is a dead weight, you haven't filled your aura with enough Light to lift the other fellow. – Edna Lister, Your Life and the Atomic Age, May 12, 1968.

You must conquer to a certain point before you can love completely. Don't reject people, for the one who revolts, hurts or angers you most doesn't know he does. Intolerant attitudes drive people away. Eliminate the final taints of being revolted by or rejecting people. – Edna Lister, December 18, 1969.

Your path is like an escalator filled with people carrying empty cups for you to fill. When you help another, you fill his cup with love. When his cup is empty, he returns for you to refill it. Don't worry whether he loves you or not, he needs you, and you can give the love. Stop looking backward on the path; look to the future and always be ready to fill each cup to overflowing. – Edna Lister, May 27, 1971.

No one wants to marry a bubble buster. – Edna Lister, Undated Papers, 1933-1971.

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Treatments for Marriage, Family and Relationships

To treat for unexpected, upsetting, stand and say, "This too shall pass away under the power of God's almighty love!" – Edna Lister, February 17, 1958.

Let others "stew in their own juice." When someone hands you negativity, say, "I love you, and I hope your outcome is wonderfully successful." – Edna Lister, January 12, 1961.

If you become Light, you are an offense to evil, darkness, and the selfishness in others. The Light you carry in your aura can offend others when you walk into a room; thus, you are a rebuke to family and friends, so don't blame them when they attack. Anyone who argues does not want to live by laws of spirit. Stand and say mentally, "This is good. Let there be Light," while another verbally abuses you; you can't make them over, nor can they remold you. – Edna Lister, Comprehension and Nonresistance, June 25, 1967.

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New Testament on Marriage, Family and Relationships

Whosoever is angry with his brother without a cause shall be in danger of the judgment: and whosoever shall say to his brother, Raca, shall be in danger of the council: but whosoever shall say, Thou fool, shall be in danger of hell fire. – Matthew 5:22. [Raca is a term of contempt for a person without education or morals, and is judgmental cursing.]

Therefore if thou bring thy gift to the altar, and there rememberest that thy brother hath ought against thee; Leave there thy gift before the altar, and go thy way; first be reconciled to thy brother, and then come and offer thy gift. – Matthew 5:23‑24.

He that loveth father or mother more than me is not worthy of me: and he that loveth son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me. – Matthew 10:37.

Then one said unto him, Behold, thy mother and thy brethren stand without, desiring to speak with thee. But he answered and said unto him that told him, Who is my mother? and who are my brethren? And he stretched forth his hand toward his disciples, and said, Behold my mother and my brethren! For whosoever shall do the will of my Father which is in heaven, the same is my brother, and sister, and mother. – Matthew 12:47-50.

A law of measured response: Moreover if thy brother shall trespass against thee, go and tell him his fault between thee and him alone: if he shall hear thee, thou hast gained thy brother. But if he will not hear thee, then take with thee one or two more, that in the mouth of two or three witnesses every word may be established. And if he shall neglect to hear them, tell it unto the church: but if he neglect to hear the church, let him be unto thee as an heathen man and a publican. – Matthew 18:15‑17.

And every one that hath forsaken houses, or brethren, or sisters, or father, or mother, or wife, or children, or lands, for my name’s sake, shall receive an hundredfold, and shall inherit everlasting life. – Matthew 19:29.

There came then his brethren and his mother, and, standing without, sent unto him, calling him. And the multitude sat about him, and they said unto him, Behold, thy mother and thy brethren without seek for thee. And he answered them, saying, Who is my mother, or my brethren? And he looked round about on them which sat about him, and said, Behold my mother and my brethren! For whosoever shall do the will of God, the same is my brother, and my sister, and mother. – Mark 3:31-35.

Then Peter began to say unto him, Lo, we have left all, and have followed thee. And Jesus answered and said, Verily I say unto you, There is no man that hath left house, or brethren, or sisters, or father, or mother, or wife, or children, or lands, for my sake, and the gospel’s, but he shall receive an hundredfold now in this time, houses, and brethren, and sisters, and mothers, and children, and lands, with persecutions; and in the world to come eternal life. – Mark 10:28-30.

Then came to him his mother and his brethren, and could not come at him for the press. And it was told him by certain which said, Thy mother and thy brethren stand without, desiring to see thee. And he answered and said unto them, My mother and my brethren are these which hear the word of God, and do it. – Luke 8:19-21.

Take heed to yourselves: If thy brother trespass against thee, rebuke him; and if he repent, forgive him. And if he trespass against thee seven times in a day, and seven times in a day turn again to thee, saying, I repent; thou shalt forgive him. – Luke 17:3-4.

Then Peter said, Lo, we have left all, and followed thee. And he said unto them, Verily I say unto you, There is no man that hath left house, or parents, or brethren, or wife, or children, for the kingdom of God’s sake, who shall not receive manifold more in this present time, and in the world to come life everlasting. – Luke 18:28-30.

Let us not therefore judge one another any more: but judge this rather, that no man put a stumblingblock or an occasion to fall in his brother's way. – Romans 14:13.

Speak not evil one of another, brethren. He that speaketh evil of his brother, and judgeth his brother, speaketh evil of the law, and judgeth the law: but if thou judge the law, thou art not a doer of the law, but a judge. – James 4:11.

Be of one mind, having compassion for one another; love as brothers, be tenderhearted, be courteous; not returning evil for evil or reviling for reviling, but on the contrary blessing; knowing that you were called to this, that you may inherit a blessing. – 1 Peter 3:8-9.

He that saith he is in the light, and hateth his brother, is in darkness even until now. He that loveth his brother abideth in the light, and there is none occasion of stumbling in him. But he that hateth his brother is in darkness, and walketh in darkness, and knoweth not whither he goeth, because that darkness hath blinded his eyes. – 1 John 2:9-11.

If a man say, I love God, and hateth his brother, he is a liar: for he that loveth not his brother whom he hath seen, how can he love God whom he hath not seen? And this commandment have we from him, That he who loveth God love his brother also. – 1 John 4:20-21.

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Old Testament on Marriage, Family and Relationships

Honour thy father and thy mother: that thy days may be long upon the land which the Lord thy God giveth thee. – Exodus 20:12.

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Edna Miriam Lister
1884 –1971
The original Pioneering Mystic
minister, teacher, and author

Edna Lister

Etymology of marriage: Old French mariage marriage; dowry, from Vulgar Latin maritaticum, from Latin maritatus, past participle of maritatre to wed, marry, give in marriage.

Etymology of family: Latin familia family servants, domestics collectively, the servants in a household, thus also members of a household, the estate, property; the household, including relatives and servants, abstract noun formed from famulus servant, slave, which is of unknown origin.

Etymology of relation: Anglo-French relacioun, Old French relacion report, connection (14c.), from Latin relationem (nominative relatio) a bringing back, restoring; a report, proposition, from relatus.

Marriage, family and relationships are all subject to many different laws of being.

Marriage, family and relationships are all subject to many different laws of doing.

Marriage, family and relationships all provide many initiations.


Blackstone, Sir William. Commentaries on the Laws of England. Clarendon Press, Oxford, Book 4, Chapter 16.

Webster, Noah. The American Dictionary of the English Language. New York: S. Converse, 1828. This work is in the Public Domain.

The Holy Bible, Authorized King James Version, 1814. This work is in the Public Domain.

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